Angels

I've had an intense learning moment today.  I have been reading this little book called The Gift of Angels by Rachel Ann Nunes.  It is about this woman who was just diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and her struggle to come to terms with it.  She keeps wondering where her miracle is like Abraham and Sarah got...or why she doesn't get an angel like those that appear to Nephi or Alma the younger, especially since she has been faithful and striving to keep the commandments.  As she is mad at God, she doesn't want to pray, or read her scriptures...thinking, what good has it done her? 


Then she gets a glimpse into the scriptures with the story about Lot...and his wife who looked back. She tries to see what it could mean applied to herself. She felt like her unwillingness to go forward and accept the Lord's will was as clearly an act of looking back as what Lot's wife had done.

"To avoid looking back, I needed to learn from Lot's example. I needed to pitch my tent not toward Sodom, which represented my old life and understanding, but toward the Lord. I needed to hear His words and understand what this experience was supposed to teach me. Now was the time to prove I would listen and not trade my future for a block of salt."

I'm not facing cancer...my trials are different and my own. But, do I look forward when faced with a trial, accepting the Lord's will and trying to understand what the experience is supposed to teach me? Or do I get angry at God and try to look back, yearning only for my previous comfort? When faced with a trial, 

"it's understandable to be upset - angry, even - but if that anger paralyzes us and doesn't allow us to progress, if it eats us up inside so we can't learn from the experience and find some joy, if all we're doing is longing for the past, then we are letting it control us. And that's not good, is it?"

We know that we were put here to learn and to prove ourselves. We must not give up when things get tough, or lax when things go smoothly.  Remember prayers and fasting bring our angels and our miracles...big or small.  And the scriptures can teach us what we need to know here and now if we know where to look. Do not let those good habits slip.

Pitching my tent toward the Lord to me means to continue in faith even if what I think I need or want does not materialize.  There is something more.   Sometimes, after we accept His will, we can then recognize how he can make our burdens light...like he did for the people of Alma.  Other times, when we just can't be strong anymore, he sends his angels to help us with our burdens, and they become our miracles.  Look carefully for them.  Unlike some accounts we read in the scriptures, they are more likely to come in the form of someone in our family (husband, sibling, parent, child), or a neghbor, a friend, or sometimes even a stranger.  You may even find yourself in the position of becoming an "Angel" to someone else.